Airport "pat down" to some "touch down" stories continues to amaze the entertained public. This time it was a titanium plate on Wrestler Ventura’s damaged hip that the security scan misread as a terrorist bomb!

Ventura’s lawsuit against TSA states that there was a "warrantless rubbing of the [his] genitals". Well, it is but natural to expect that there is a certain "sensation" felt when genitals are rubbed … I will restate similar report previously published here in this unique website.

Like Ventura, this other TSA guinea pig complained that a good-looking female security agent explored his groin, and grabbed his suspicious "large balls" during the pat down. Asked why those were suspiciously large, this guy was weird but so unbelievably honest when he replied it was because of too much self-petting since he was young.

The surprised agent abruptly withdrew her investigating hands from his genitals calling him a jerk, especially when she noticed that this airline traveler was enjoying the whole process …he was feeling her "touch down" and the excitement was on his face as if on the verge of orgasm. For obvious reasons, let’s rename this guy Mr. Wonder Balls.

The agent refused when Balls cynically asked her to continue doing her hand-duty on his lower body in the airport to save mankind!!!

Here’s the difference between Ventura’s complaint and Mr.Balls’ protest: While Ventura was suing for "unwarranted and unreasonable intrusions on … [his] personal privacy and dignity …" Wonder Balls was seeking redress for "premature withdrawal" in violation of his constitutional right to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness".