Last week I talked about my sojourn into the World of Warcraft, my departure therefrom, and the debilitating nausea that now overcomes me when I see a Tauren druid hopping its way across Thunder Bluff. You might think I have nothing to show for my endless hours of questing, grinding, raiding and not bathing. To the contrary, I got something priceless out of the game: nothing.

 If you haven’t played World of Warcraft, you might not know that it’s essentially Project Runway set in Valhalla. Everyone goes out to kill horrible creatures in order to obtain magical fancy outfits. Some would argue that the point of the clothing is to make you better at killing creatures, but I think it’s more honest to say that the point of killing the creatures is to get better clothing.

At any rate, by the end of my Warcraft days I had many magical fancy outfits, and many gems to put on my magical fancy outfits, and many bags to hold my magical fancy outfits. I was thrilled when the gamemakers introduced the ability to switch magical fancy outfits instantly. And then I quit, and I had nothing. (Well, to be fair, I had lower back problems and an office full of empty 2-liter soda bottles, but you can get those anywhere.)