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I don't know what to think... But I know what to do... share with you :)

Written by Subject: Conspiracies
A postcard for me. Inviting me to be on another 'special list' in time for April 19th Government Propaganda. Or they could be another source of truth (in line for a raid).

6 Comments in Response to

Comment by Ducati Jeanne
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Okay Oyate, your dreams have been answered. The British Army has a team of rescue helicopters that are piloted, "manned", and maintained by women.  No spandex, just BDU's.  They're stationed in Afghanistan.  They're doing an excellent job. How bad you want it, buddy........

  Buck Norton

Comment by Found Zero
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OK, I can deal. Lemme catch my breath for a second here. Young buck, lemme lean on your shoulder for a minute.

Hey, did you see that hot chick I was running away from just then? Hoo-ah. Boy that was great.

OK, this might be my only chance. Hot Gun Slinging Chicks In Spandex: the first one was a little busty for me. I'm looking for something just a bit heavier than Winona Ryder and not as heavy as whatever Latina chick is hot these days. I don't mind some hip action and something to grab onto but upstairs it's like I like to surf ON the ocean, not drown in it. If that's not clear I can send you some of my best pr0n and just let you get a feel for what I'm into.

Then you won't have to chase me through the damn hills. Believe me, I can make it SO EASY FOR YOU TO KILL ME IF YOU JUST BE THE WOMAN I REALLY WANT YOU TO BE.

I'd rather have you for the split second before you kill me than endure this life of mediocity and shame that I live now. And HEY, every other man on this board feels exactly the same way I do, they are just too shy to admit it.

I yearn for you tragically,


Comment by Found Zero
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OK, how do you say "meeeeeeeeeeeooooooooooow" in Patriotese?


Youch. Stand clear boys, kitty's got claws. Don't worry I'm a trained professional.


Ho dip! OK I'm bleeding, ouch ouch ouch ouch oochie ouch, that's it, runs boys, head for the hills! BUGOUT BUGOUT BUGOUT!

(now you have to imagine me running through the hills with my hands held high above my head screaming "GROUNDHOG! GROUNDHOG!")

Comment by Found Zero
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I'll tell you what to think. I think somebody out there is telling us that after all this time THERE REALLY IS A CADRE OF HOT, GUN-SLINGING CHICKS IN SPANDEX that will come and rescue us in our time in need and then make sweet, sweet love to us before dashing off on a helo-towed rope.

And if it's not this time boys, by Gods it will be next time. It has to happen sometime because it is said that if you focus on a dream for long enough, one day you will wake up and find it to be a reality.

Come to be my lethal warrior princess. Save me my queen of assasins. I'll figure out what to tell my wife when I have something to be guilty about.

Comment by Brock Lorber
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Dang, Warrior!  You are the resistance!

Comment by Powell Gammill
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They are an advertiser on your shows.