are social predators who charm, manipulate and ruthlessly plow their
way through life, leaving a broad trail of broken hearts, shattered
expectations and empty wallets. Completely lacking in conscience and
feelings for others, they selfishly take what they want and do as
they please, violating social norms and expectations without the
slightest sense of guilt or regret. - Dr. Robert Hare,
Above is the unvarnished
opinion of the man who is, arguably, the world expert on the subject,
who also provides this list of characteristics of psychopathy.
confronts the issue of how individuals can cope with the problem
directly, using examples from the lives of three women.
approach is not without risks and hazards, but if you have a
psychopath in your life you understand the costs they are already
exacting and can best decide for yourself whether this could work for
Because psychopaths study us
from inside our world, but are not of our world their behavior does
not include the limitations of compassion, empathy and conscience.
Their behavior is predatory. We are their prey. Because they lie
without conscience they feel no guilt. Therefore, when confronted,
either in person or in court, they are often able to persuade
listeners and juries. The victim, often already traumatized, is
likely to appear frightened, stammering, distraught. The psychopath
often appears cool and assured.
Additionally, even in our
personal lives, many people decide who to believe based, not on the
facts, but who is more likely to benefit them.
Psychopaths use barrages of emotional abuse,
directed at their victim. Shocked at the untruths, the victim is
often traumatized into inaction, allowing the psychopath to get when
he or she wants.
Psychopaths study how to be charming. Charm is the
bait which hooks their prey so the reeling in can take place and the
You never have a relationship with a psychopath,
you have just not been consumed yet.
The Gradient in
psychopaths exhibit a range of behavior depending on their inherent
attributes for intelligence and other factors. Smart ones are far
more dangerous than dumb ones.
Psychopaths who are less
intelligent are generally focused on shorter range goals. The more
intelligent psychopaths may lay out long range strategies for
obtaining their goals, for instance running for Congress and becoming
president, a 'defense' contractor, or some other massive accrual of
When the more intelligent of
these individuals, and at any time 20,000 psychopathic individuals
with I. Q.s over 180 are walking among us, gain power in government,
finance, or business, their impact is radically increased.
For all of these reasons the
strategies used by psychopaths need to be well understood by all
normal people so recognition of the psychopathic among us becomes
less expensive for us as individuals and as a people.
What we know today –
Impact on us as individuals and as a society
While our understanding of
the condition of psychopathy has grown enormously over the last 15
years, coping with its impact on us, as individuals, and as a
society, has not yet really begun. Yet it must, and immediately.
The impact of psychopaths on
finance, government, the judiciary, and business, has grown
enormously, along with changes in law instituted by these same
individuals to limit their potential liabilities and facilitate their
The more intelligent among
the psychopathic study our emotional reactions, emulating these to
better facilitate their manipulation of us emotionally and so control
The most successful
con-artists are psychopaths. As the psychopathic rise in influence
they build a culture among those around then which works to modify
the behavior of otherwise normal individuals, habituating them to
accepting roles in which they, too, act without conscience.
We are vulnerable to these
modifications of our behavior, as documented by the Milgram
experiment on obedience to authority figures
This series of social psychology experiments was conducted by
Yale University psychologist Stanley Milgram, measuring the
willingness of study participants to obey an authority figure who
ordered them to perform acts which conflicted with their personal
The chilling result
demonstrated most people will follow orders when these come from an
individual acting in authority.
Psychopaths, acting without
conscience, routinely assume roles of authority they do not possess,
but also abuse authority when able to occupy positions of authority
'legitimately.' When these are positions within government these are
actions taken 'under color of law,' and are actionable, when
recognized as such. However, psychopaths are rarely identified
through our justice system as of yet.
Estimates of the losses to
all of us through the the actions of psychopaths are not easily
estimated, though the one estimate by a recognized expert,
neuroscientist Kent Kiehl, placed the national cost of psychopathy at
$460 billion a year. Losses caused by psychopaths originate from
dislocations, loss of assets, decreased ability to work, loss of
friends and other relationships, and physical trauma. Psychopaths
routinely destroy family trust, the capital, which for all humanity,
These costs are also borne
by the agencies, public and private, which provide for those in need.
Often victims are forced onto welfare and made jobless due to the
actions of the psychopathic among us.
Psychopaths are born with
the normal range of I.Q.s. Victims lose their homes, their
professions, their self-esteem and can be left traumatized and unable
Understand and take
Our Personal and Business
Is there chaos in your life?
Look for the psychopath, be discerning, it is not always easy to
identify the correct individual. In families, others impacted
themselves, could be engaging in angry behavior as a result of their
relationship with the psychopath. Psychopaths sow hatred and distrust
where ever they go.
The psychopath is often
found at the center of the web of deceits which can stretch in all
Psychopaths try to get those
around them to fight. When those in your family cannot trust each
other the psychopath can accrue power and control to themselves.
The cure for this is truth
If you are told something
about another individual ask them directly, and immediately, for the
facts. Give them a chance to defend themselves. A
psychopath will attempt to limit your communications through
manipulations all of which have the same bottom line, “don't
mention this to them,”
Nearly everyone you meet
will tell you to put your tail between your legs and hide when you
realize you are confronting a psychopath. Their reasons are numerous
and founded in undeniable fact.
Psychopaths, having no
conscience, have no limits to their behavior except how it benefits
All serial killers are
psychopaths, all con-men are psychopaths.
In professions and in their
'personal' lives, psychopaths use charm, lies, power, manipulation,
intimidation, and extortion as part of their routine means for
achieving their goals.
They cannot be trusted.
The concentration of highly
psychopathic individuals increases as you move up the ladder in
wealth and status and these individuals are far more dangerous
because they are more likely to cooperate.
Psychopaths change the
culture within corporations, families, and all organizations where
they achieve footholds and power by influencing the attitudes and
choices made by those around them. These individuals become,
Inform yourself before you
start. Become familiar with the increasing body of academic
information now available at Life
Extracting yourself from a
relationship with a psychopath is hazardous. Many people spend years
in the attempt, made highly problematical because psychopaths seize
control of assets and manipulate family members, persuading them to
distrust their target, thus isolating them emotionally and denying
them what is needed to escape. Also visit Love Fraud, which has an
excellent forum, offering support and advice from those who have
Changing your name,
abandoning your past, family pets, cherished possessions, sometimes
even your family, are all issues which you may confront if you choose
IF YOU CHOOSE TO FIGHT
The court system has no
framework for recognizing the unvarnished fact psychopaths lie
consistently and persuasively since they possess no conscience. Our
court system is designed taking into account a human being who has a
conscience and exhibits behavior which reflects real guilt, doubt,
and a normal human reaction to stress.
Psychopaths emulate human
emotions, but do not feel them.
Our approach does not
include taking the psychopath to court, until and unless, you can
overcome these issues by presenting expert witnesses in court on
On this site we provide
information on fighting back using two tools, accountability and
You must clearly, thoroughly
and persistently document the acts of the psychopath, using their
name and providing proofs which, if presented in court, would be
sufficient to make your case without other testimony.
You must be prepared to be
attacked, ruthlessly, continuously, and viciously. Psychopaths lie
and will attempt to destroy all which makes your life worth living.
Although psychopaths tend to
be loners this is not always the case. They can and will cooperate
when cooperating is in their best interests, jointly. Read - When
If the psychopath is a
family member you must never have undocumented communication with
If phone conversations take
place, record them. Copy all communications, make multiple copies and
keep at least one off site.
Rewrite all wills and
property agreements to end any claims the psychopath might use in the
future. Notarize and file these with the court and send copies to all
members of the family and close friends with whom you are in
Anything and everything can
be used as a weapon against you by a psychopath. Children are
routinely destroyed by psychopaths when their spouses attempt to
leave the marriage or relationship. Since our court system routinely
shows calloused disregard for the well being of children, you must
take this into account in advance.
Putting all of these
materials up online will both immunize you and help others avoid the
psychopath you are attempting to evade.
Make sure you change your
locks, get security if you believe the psychopath might present a
physical threat to you, your family, friends or property.
Coping with trauma
who had been through a relationship with a psychopath will come out
of it with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Today technologies exist
allowing us to alleviate the symptoms and return to normal
functioning. Two excellent technologies are neurofeedback,
works well, though there are many
others. Biofeedback is also excellent. See Quantum
These technologies, and
more, are about to become far more accessible.
from living with the chaos which accompanies the psychopath is sweet
beyond measure. You can achieve this peace along with renewed