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The "State of the World" Address, Translated From the Globalese

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Can you believe it's late September once again? That magical time of year when an old globalists' fancy turns to world domination and the world waits with bated breath for the United Nations Secretary-General to deliver his annual "State of the World" address to the UN General Assembly gathered in New York.

. . . Oh, you didn't know there was a "State of the World" address. Don't worry, neither does anyone else who actually has productive things to do with their life. But rest assured there is such a speech delivered at the "General Debate" which takes place at the opening of each session of the UN General Assembly in the last week of September. Formally known as "The Secretary-General's Address to the General Assembly," it is followed by no one and impacts nothing, exactly like most other speeches at the UN—except the ones where the POTUS is threatening to bomb somebody or the Prime Minister of Israel is holding up cartoon bombs like some demented Wile E. Coyote.

You see, the problem is that these "State of the World" speeches are not delivered in English but in Globalese, that strange tongue spoken only by those equally strange creatures who refer to themselves as "world leaders" and parade around in motorcades. So I thought I would take key passages from this year's speech, delivered by current Secretary-General Somethingsomething Whatshisface, and translate it into ordinary English.