Young brothers and sisters;
This is none of my business, it's yours but it's my business to try and protect you. I am the last in a long line of protectors. Good thing too eh because obviously we are doing a shitty job at protecting you. But I wonder. Why have you turned away from God? Because most of us, if not all of us, our families came from a spiritual tradition. And to neglect tradition is in some way a death in the family.
I don't mean to blame you. Part of having a relationship with God is being free to neglect it or even get mad at God like you would any other relationship in your life and God can often be blamed for troubles. After all, is it not written that He knows all and sees all?
So to all apparent wisdom, it seems that God might not love us because we can call on Him for help in our most desperate hour and sometimes it just seems like He is on a bathroom break. "Thanks for your call, please leave a message".
OK, that is not God neglecting you, it's us. Because God put a fire in our hearts and He told us to be His hands. You are His eyes and ears and mind. You are holy and Wakan. And when you cried for help and nobody came, it is not because Father God did not listen to you, it is because one of us failed to come. And we are sorry but we are just humans too. Just like you. And our little problems and foibles and failures keep our eyes from seeing reality and we have tried to help as best we can and we realize so many of you slip through our fingers. But the truth is we love you.
We try. And we fail. But we do not stop trying. In the face of dismay and horrible tragedy, we don't always have the answer but we keep trying. I know at least 3 people that love you now and among these are my brother Ed, my brother Mobinem (Mobius Nemisis), my warrior brother Morpheus, my sisters Renee and Gene and my spirit-daugher Catherine, I know it doesn't feel like it but these people lay down their lives daily for you.
Yes, you. YOU. Whomever you are. We are always trying. And we will never stop. If you call for help, one of us should come. WE SHOULD. WE ARE SUPPOSED TO. But in this time, we are back-logged so in truth, we might not get there in time. It don't mean you aren't important to us, you are. It don't mean we don't hear you, we do. We just got our hands full. We are just humans. Who happen to love you.
So. You need help and when you run up the flag, we didn't come running in a cloud of dust with John Wayne and the cavelry. And all you got is you.
But consider the source of our power: the ancestors and founders. There is only one person that has your cloud of ancestors and spirit protectors and that is you. Let's even say you were sexually molested as a child and so your immediate family is toxic and so you not only feel your ancestors let you down, YOU WANT THEM THE FUCK AWAY FROM YOU because all they have brought you is pain and suffering.
Kittan, Oyasin, just turn the pages back a bit in your family history. You still have ancestors who love you because, and this is truth, YOU ARE THE RESULT OF LOVE AND HARD WORK because the human family has undgone much suffering, and all of us that are alive today are the result of somebody digging their heels in and saying "I WILL SURVIVE AND MORE, I WILL GIVE BIRTH TO A MIGHTY PEOPLE" and that people is you.
And that is the storey of your people and mine. Life has always been difficult. It has never been easy. It hasn't been easy on me either. My bones hurt because I have cancer and it hurts to breath. My bones hurt and I am also afriad.
Yes, the Great Oyate is afraid. My deepest fear is that I die alone and thirsty without anybody to just bring me a drink of water and pet my hair. Oyate is afraid of dying alone. And that's odd because I'm never alone, I am a native and I always have my planet and the mountains to talk to, my ancestors listen, the Ones Below always listen so what am I afraid of?
I think I am afraid of dying without you. My human family. Because I love you and when I am with you I feel better. But if I am not so lucky, I sing to you my Oyasin so that if you are ever alone, we are always thinking about you.
My friends at dataSpheric barely tolerate me to put up my songs so for this time you can listen to me sing to you. Now at this moment, things seem to be screwed up on the internet so I don't know which song you are going to hear. It's either "I love you" song or the beginning of "take me with you" song by The Storey. But in case you don't hear I Love You song, here are the words:
From the time when I was born
I am always and I have always been thinking about you.
I love you and I love you, I am always
And I am always
And I am always
And I am always thinking about you my special ones
I am always, I am always and I am always thinking about you my pretty ones
And I love you.
And I love you and I love you.
I am always thinking about you my pretty ones.
(and then I usually skip beat)
All of the beautiful
all of the beautiful people
you are so beautiful to me
and I love you hey-yo.
Aho. I believe I can speak for Arizona, from me and my brothers Ed and John and other mightly brothers such as Jet and Morpheus and even to our crazy brother Ernie and 4409, we are doing this because we love you. And I feel confident in saying our brave sisters like Renee and Gene and many others, they love you too. I think that's the only reason we're doing this and that's why we put the 3VOL in the middle of the R3VOlUTION.
And that's why I spell it R3VOlUTION. Not R3VOLUTION. Because it's supposed to be mirror-writing; you should put on the t-shirt and look at yourself in the mirror and see the word LOVE looking right back at you. It's a secret-coded message. We love you or more appropriately, we 3VOl you.
Now put this message in your parfleche. Oh wait, you guys don't carry parfleche anymore you have pocket in your jeans. OK, put this in your pocket and carry it with you: we 3VOl you. And Oyate does too. So with 3VOl, there is only one thing I can do for you which is to give you my blessing:
Let the mountains remember you
Let the air sing to you
No matter where you go, you are home,
this is your home and you belong here.