This was the lowest level since October 2013 and the biggest miss in exactly 2 years, with output, new orders and employment all expand at slower rates in August; Markit adds that "Input cost inflation picks up fractionally, but remains well below the survey average."

The report also notes that the latest rise in production volumes was the weakest since the weather-related slowdown recorded in January 2014 - perhaps someone can blame it on the record hot July. Some survey respondents cited a cyclical slowdown in new business growth, as well as heightened uncertainty regarding the demand outlook in August.

But wait, the financial comedy TV said China can not possibly affect the US. Just chalk it up to the latest thing the economists were wrong about.

Most notably, now that even highly subjective survey data can no longer be rigged to boost confidence, there is only one recourse: beg and plead for the Fed to not hike rates or better yet, as Bank of America did overnight, just hint that QE4 is just around the corner if the market crashes enough. To wit, commenting on the flash PMI data, Tim Moore, senior economist at Markit said:

"August's survey highlights a lack of growth momentum and continued weak price pressures across the U.S. manufacturing sector, which adds some fuel to the dovish argument as policymakers weigh up tightening policy in September.

"With the headline PMI swiftly losing ground after a modest rebound during July, the latest figure now points to the weakest overall pace of manufacturing growth for almost two years.