Some things surpass all understanding. Why in the name of God and little catfish are we embargoing Cuba? The revolution occurred in 1959, some 55 years ago. A young man then of 20 would now be 75. The Mariel boat lift came in 1980, 35 years ago. The same man of 20 would now be 55. Even a newborn would be 35. Which is to say that all "Cubans" under thirty-five, and a very high proportion of those older, in fact are not Cubans. I imagine a conversation:

Alejandro: "I am a Cuban, and proud of it."

Me: "Ah, I see. Born in Cuba, I suppose."

Alejandro: "Uh, no. Miami General, actually."

"But a Cuban citizen, certainly."

Alejandro: "Well, no. I am a US citizen. You see…."

Me: "Assuredly you have lived extensively in Cuba, for many years at least."

Alejandro: "Well…."

Me: "Have you ever been to Cuba? I have."

Alejandro: "Well…no, not exactly. I…you see…."

Me: "Yes, Alex, I believe I do see. You were born in America, speak native English, carry only a US passport, and have never been to Cuba. Ah, my fellow gringo, you are no more a Cuban than I am a Scotsman. Why do you pretend? Halloween doesn't come until October."

These pseudo-Cuban blatherers are the worst enemy of the Cuban people, a scourge keeping them forever in the semi-penury of an impoverishing embargo. If they are indeed Cubans, they are traitors to their people and if not, foreign oppressors.

My high-school ride. Cuba is a trove of antique cars, 1959 and back. It is not clear how forcing eleven million people to drive crumblingcarcanchas conduces to American prosperity and security. FOE staff photo.

As for the Republican Party, they are the most repellent mob of patriotic poseurs, drumbeating jingoes, and disturbed curiosities ever to walk this or, probably, any other planet. Some would say that they are as reprehensible as the Democrats, though that would be a stretch.