Man, Lucky Red, I just sprayed a mouthful of Coke over my monitor upon reading the opening sentences of your opinion. :-D

But now I actually have to go shopping.

 Oh, thank god!  I'm going shopping now...Oh, wait, no, I can't cause I don't have a job, my house was foreclosed on, I have no healthcare and my retirement was given to Halliburton to spend in Iraq.

Oh, well, it was good while it lasted...

 Sure it is...... and pay no attention to that man behind the screen.....