Jack, 

It's nice to have you back within the warm confines of the “all-too-often uterine-like” Freedom's Phoenix.  Speaking only for myself, I can say that we’ve missed you. lol.  How was the big, cold world out there anyway? 

On a personal and yet selfish level, I’m glad you’re back so I don’t have to post as much.  In the good old days of 2009, all too often I would go to post a news link and then “BOING!”  - like Barbara Eden in “I Dream of Jeannie,” it would just appear. 

I don’t want to ask too much, especially since you’ve so recently returned, but I would appreciate a small favor.  What I need is your help to complete my Freedom’s Phoenix-meets-late 60’s / early 70’s Barbara Eden fantasy,  so I’d appreciate it to no end if you would kindly grow yourself a pair of sweet cans and start wearing chiffon. 

Just know Jack, that even though I've asked you to defile yourself by altering your body chemistry with synthetic estrogen for my amusement, I'd never ask you to live in a wine bottle, not even one of those cool Chianti bottles with the wicker on the outside.

Any assistance in this matter would be greatly appreciated.

Peace,

Jet