...so now HUMOR is a 'mental illness'!?!

I, for one, enjoy Oyate's persistance of absurdity.  It gives me some minor release from the tension of what is actually happening. 

It also points out the dicks when they don't smile...   LIGHTEN UP!   sheesh...

Having read th rough the materials posted on this page, I am amazed to find so many mentally ill persons. Is t here something about the weather in Arizona? this needs to be investigated by the FDA

jack

Or some duct tape. 

Somebody kindly offer Oyate some more mescaline  :))

Calling all people of the way,

pastor Anderson and I have now made it into the Cochise canyons and armed as we are, we can hold of the feds for a week or so until we find the passage into the underground caves that Goyanthley, the one the bean-eaters called Ge-Hron-im-aho, was able to evade you for so long.

You blank-faced killers called him "Jerinimo" and in your pitiful language this means "one who attacks you from above".

This is the coeficient to "siyonara" which means one who falls to his death, which is another word of honor you had to learn from cultures other than yourselves.

Your people fear death and use this fear upon God's Holy Children. Therefore do we resist you through generations of Holy People.

THE WORDS OF UNITY TO ME ARE U'LAAH HU AKBUR.

THE NAME OF FORGIVENESS IS YA'SHUA

THE WORD OF WAR IS QUEE. For most recently, we were Delaware, signatories to the Six Houses. For never to this day have we renounced our bond.

Humbly, I make a prayer as I smoke my tobacco. I pray to our ancestors. We still have some of the wampum belts. We are brothers and sisters. People of the Six Houses, look at us now. You have everything compared to us now. You have land. Your land.

Grandfathers and grandmothers, what are we supposed to do now?

All of the people are naked and starving now.

Contact information for the Yuma Deputy County Prosecutor that's currently pursuing charges against Anderson appears below along with his Arizona State Bar Number.

The good folks of Arizona, especially Yuma County, may want to find out why this prosecutor is wasting county resources pursuing what appears to be an unreasonable  prosecution against Anderson for an incident that happened at a federal checkpoint.

Folks may also want to determine whether or not this is the same prosecutor who has recently sought a warrant for Mr. Anderson in what looks to be shaping up into a malicious prosecution regarding a videotape incident that Anderson wasn't even involved in.

If the circumstances warrant, the appropriate person(s) may want to look into filing a bar complaint against Mr. Katz's license to practice law in this state. 

--------

Now as I said, me and pastor Anderson are parked outside of a Starbucks, we won't say which one but this make for an unlikely fulfillment of prophecy.

See it was said among the people of part of my nations that right about now, in this generation, all the warriors of old would be reborn.

Now I know this all might sound strange at first but if you even smelled my wife's biscuits and gravy you could even imagine worse that a white racist pastor being rescued by a half-breed.

By the time we got loose of my wife's clutched this man was bent and bleeding and barely able to walk on crutches, much less to ride a horse for many miles.

By the time I got the horses and him to water the man was about fallin outta his saddle and we kinda dribbled some corn meal mixed with water into his mouth which was given to us by a passing indian.

And right about then Pastor Steve started showing manifestations of hypo-hyrdation and hyper-salinification and I realized the passing indian had did us a mercy.

See when your body gets dehydrated to a certain level, just a tea-spoon of salt will put you into anaphylactic shock and as hurt as he was, his poor body just couldn't take it.

I tried CPR and ventilations till I figured his spirit relations could tell I was doing him honor and then the indian came back and we dug a hole in the ground.

We buried him out in the desert and we sung the songs of our ancestors and while we ain't specific to his religion, some of the cloud people came and rained just a bit, just a bit on the grave of pastor Steven Anderson.

And we will never, ever tell you and you will never, ever find his body.

Well just about then this man's eyes went wide as a cat when you got 'em in the headlights and his back srcuntched up and he started to yowling and fissing and I knew what that meant, my wife was coming back with her caustic biscuits and gravy.

And I realized that I'd intended to have mercy on this poor sinner's soul but as is my tendency I'd messed up the winder of oppertoonity just a-telling stories.

Well the wife sets the plate in front of this man, the plate is made of tin but it's already melting through him and we'd already worked him over pretty good.

I said "son I been through this once or twice, I'll tell you what to do and if you value your life you will listen carefully to what I tell you to do".

For I had the guy trussed up tight as hell, I know for sure, tied the knots myself but when faced with a common enemy, even criminals and lawmen become friends.

Tell you the truth, I'm not sure who saved who, I'd swear we both were dead but one of us both through and the man chewed my belt buckly into a kife edge with his bare teeth.

We used that to cut the pastor free of his bonds and mounted the first horses we saw and high-tailed it for the Nevada border.

Now we're not sure what we're guilty of now brothers, whatever we did first, we did something or else other. I never did anything wrong in my life but don't ask me and don't ask my wife all I did was preserve life and property.

Didn't Yuma used to have a federal prison for bad men and enemies of the state before John Wayne cleaned everything up.  lol

Good dogs.

Well for those of you liberal watch dogs reading and a-watchin, as the dogs settle down to eating 500 pounds of pure American Jettison, us cowboys usually gather around the fire and tell us some stories.

See you can't bring a prisoner to justice out in the desert, not at night what with the coyotes and the cactus and the invisible jack-holes that just come up out of nowhere and can snap your horse's let right out from under you. Nope, out here in the lone, cold range we bank up a fire, position ourselves under available cover and keep the prisoners bearly dead or alive.

For the law says after a citizen's arrest, even as officially deputized this or thats, we have to deliver our prisoner to the nearest officer of the law but until then we'll just camp out here outside of Starbucks and enjoy the free wi-fi.

See we're pretty sure we got pastor Steven Anderson or someother jerk that looks like him, all the white guys with short hair cuts look pretty much the same to me. All I know is when I snuck up and busted him he started hootin and hollerin about the constitution and how I was abusin his rights and that's how I was pretty sure I had the right man.

Oh Lord Lacey comes to tell us lowly low lifes we ain't worthy of posting now that His Majesty has a fancy-pants radio show.

For the record, I been in this movement since Lacey was this little 200 pound kid I used to push around. Now that he's a little 500 pound kid he figures he can push me around. And I used to buy him candy.

THERE'S PATRIOT GRATITUDE FOR YOU. LITTLE RED, SICK 'EM. SHOW NO MERCY.

Boys! Boys! Come quick! My wife found pastor Steven Anderson hiding under the kitchen table and she make a run at him with a plate full of her lethal biscuits and gravy!

There was nothing for us to do but to tell him to run and run like the dickens he did but she snared him around the ankle with her lariat and boy, that pastor fought like a wild cat for as long as it took but she got him.

She got him good boys and she ain't giving him up without the bounty.

Can someone say ROADTRIP...yoohoo.

I love YUMA....Its not that far..and a fun town to be in :) Can't wait to go back!

Oyate, 

You funny but my Lord man do you, Lucky Red, and Lori Smith need some kind of hobby.  All this sh*t ain't THAT interesting.  Plus after a while, like fluoride, it'll rot yer brains. 

I've got a feeling we're going to need all the well-functioning Central Nervous Systems we possibly can here pretty soon. 

I don't want to alarm anybody but there is a well dressed white man hiding under my kitchen table and I'd swear he answers to the name "pastor Steven Anderson".

It was raining outside and he looked all cold and wet so I let him inside and the poor boy sure was hungry.

Now don't y'all get all up in a lather, we're just gonna get him dried up, fed up, bed him down and see if he's injured. The last thing we need is a bunch of lights and sirens scaring up the rest of the stock.

Besides, you FBI boys show up in the morning, my wife ain't letting you go without a proper breakfast which could precipitate a whole hostage situation because swear to Gods, she won't let you go till you tell her what you think of her biscuits and gravy.

Boys, just do what we do; wait till she ain't lookin, scrape the dirt aside with one foot, poor the crap on the floor and cover it up with the other foot for there ain't no hope the dogs will eat that crap before she finds out.

If you do this, there is some hope for your escape. If you do escape, alert the federal goverment that we are all held prisoner against our will by my evil wife. Hells man, we'll GIVE YOU PASTOR STEVEN ANDERSON ON A SILVER PLATTER just don't, and I mean do not, and I mean do not ever eat a plate of my wife's biscuits and gravy or you will end up like us.

Yours in Sincere Desperation,

Oyate, Commander, Unorganized Milita, 5th Mounted Army of Arizona, currently prisoner of war behind matrilineal enemy lines.

All I have to say is LMFAO...

I mean come on...this is a complete waste of finite resourses...

If your taxes are too high in YUMA blame this prosecuter. Maybe we will have to have a campaign to rid that scoundrel from the Pirate ship!